The family, religion and education are the three primary social institutions in democratic societies. The
family is the most basic of all three because its function is to bring new people into the world. Education
and religion assist the family in socializing children, teaching the new citizens to live according to the
cultural expectations of society. For a half a century, I have worked in all three areas, as an educator, a
social psychologist and a minister. This newsletter focuses on human relations. It is intended to assist
families in all three areas of development. You are invited to react to the content of this letter. In fact, your
input will assure its relevance. Topics on all three areas will be discussed according to needs expressed.
The section Ask the Teacher will be led by Elsida E. Cordova, Pd.D., a retired educator from the
American school system. E-mail her at asktheteacher@religiousreview.com
For a FREE subscription to this newsletter, e-mail me at Newsletter@religiousreview.com
family is the most basic of all three because its function is to bring new people into the world. Education
and religion assist the family in socializing children, teaching the new citizens to live according to the
cultural expectations of society. For a half a century, I have worked in all three areas, as an educator, a
social psychologist and a minister. This newsletter focuses on human relations. It is intended to assist
families in all three areas of development. You are invited to react to the content of this letter. In fact, your
input will assure its relevance. Topics on all three areas will be discussed according to needs expressed.
The section Ask the Teacher will be led by Elsida E. Cordova, Pd.D., a retired educator from the
American school system. E-mail her at asktheteacher@religiousreview.com
For a FREE subscription to this newsletter, e-mail me at Newsletter@religiousreview.com
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Volume 1, Number 7 Focusing on Relations April 1, 2007
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Volume 1, Number 7 Focusing on Relations April 1, 2007
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ASK THE TEACHER
By E.E.Cordova, Pd.D
By E.E.Cordova, Pd.D
**************************************
Words of Wisdom
Words of Wisdom
Let nothing disturb thee,
Nothing affright thee;
All things are passing;
God never changeth;
Patient endurance
Attaineth to all things;
Who God possesseth
In nothing is wanting;
Alone God sufficeth.
- **************************************
| How to Develop an Effective Prayer Life is my latest book. It deals with becoming intimate with God through prayer. Order your copy from your favorite bookstore or click the book icon. |
Question: It is difficult for me to wake up my 4th
grader each morning to get him ready for school.
What can I do to do it without making it a bad
experience for him and creating in him a dislike for
school?
Answer: Healthy children are mostly early risers,
because they go to bed early. However, children
who have not slept enough resist having to get up
in the morning.
Sleep is rest. Each child should sleep at least
eight hours every night in order to be fully rested
in the morning. Some need more. A sleepless
child does not function well in school. And this
adverse experience may contribute to develop in
him a dislike for school.
On the other hand, restful children are mostly
eager to go to school and enjoy the learning
experience and the interaction with peers.
Plan in writing your child's after school hours so
that he may have enough time for home work,
play, eat dinner, etc. Then, he should go to bed
early enough to be fully rested in the morning.
grader each morning to get him ready for school.
What can I do to do it without making it a bad
experience for him and creating in him a dislike for
school?
Answer: Healthy children are mostly early risers,
because they go to bed early. However, children
who have not slept enough resist having to get up
in the morning.
Sleep is rest. Each child should sleep at least
eight hours every night in order to be fully rested
in the morning. Some need more. A sleepless
child does not function well in school. And this
adverse experience may contribute to develop in
him a dislike for school.
On the other hand, restful children are mostly
eager to go to school and enjoy the learning
experience and the interaction with peers.
Plan in writing your child's after school hours so
that he may have enough time for home work,
play, eat dinner, etc. Then, he should go to bed
early enough to be fully rested in the morning.
HOW TWO BECOME ONE
By J.C.Cordova, D.Min., LCSW
Whenever two love birds sign the contract of
matrimony, we say: “They were made for each
other,” or we say: “This is a marriage made in
heaven, or: “These birds of a feather are now
flocking together,” or:”Finally, these two soul
mates are bonded as one.”
But since the good Lord made us all different,
marriage may be better defined as the gathering
of two strangers to live in intimacy, in a face-to-
face relationship for good.
When love birds first come together, they begin
to identify common things of mutual interest to
converse. They even find communality where
there is none. These, of course, are polite
actions prompted by mutual physical attraction.
In fact, they may not even be aware of their
differences.
Many couples sign their marriage contracts while
holding such relationships. Soon the sudden
intimacy turns a previous nice interaction into a
nasty one. Frequently, this undesirable
condition is resolved by an early parting of
company. Frankly, many marriages should
have never taken place, because of their
obvious great differences. However, many other
could be saved if only the couples in question
would be willing to work under the guidance of a
professional marriage counselor to heal their
relationships to live together in peace and
harmony.
The above discussion begs the question: “What
can love birds do to determine if they should be
married? And what can young married couples
do to stay together for life, as traditional
marriage vows demand? First, it is important to
recognize that each love bird comes from a
different nest. And regardless of resemblance,
all nests are different. Customs differ from family
to family, each having unique peculiarities and
subtleties unintelligible to outsiders, which only
emerge in a face-to-face, intimate relationship. It
is an exclusive way of life each party brings to
the relationship requiring much understanding.
He must be sensitive to hers, and she must be
as sensitive to his.
Second, the above discussion indicates that it is
crucial to define mutuality in marriage beyond
physical attraction and infatuation. Mutuality in
couple’s relations is a high degree of affinity. It
includes the physical, the intellectual, the
emotional and the creedal. Both persons in the
pre-marital or marital relationship think feel and
believe differently. And the first rule of
engagement must be to respect, understanding
and accept the other person’s perspective on
life.
What does it mean to become one in
matrimony? It means that while love birds retain
their own personalities, their joining together to
live as husband and wife gives them a higher
status of being. This new status transcends all
minor individual preferences each party
considered important in their single existence.
It becomes the responsibility of each to work
hard to honor and preserve the relationship.
Next we will tern to conflict resolution in mate
selection and marriage. Lord Bless you and
yours.
By J.C.Cordova, D.Min., LCSW
Whenever two love birds sign the contract of
matrimony, we say: “They were made for each
other,” or we say: “This is a marriage made in
heaven, or: “These birds of a feather are now
flocking together,” or:”Finally, these two soul
mates are bonded as one.”
But since the good Lord made us all different,
marriage may be better defined as the gathering
of two strangers to live in intimacy, in a face-to-
face relationship for good.
When love birds first come together, they begin
to identify common things of mutual interest to
converse. They even find communality where
there is none. These, of course, are polite
actions prompted by mutual physical attraction.
In fact, they may not even be aware of their
differences.
Many couples sign their marriage contracts while
holding such relationships. Soon the sudden
intimacy turns a previous nice interaction into a
nasty one. Frequently, this undesirable
condition is resolved by an early parting of
company. Frankly, many marriages should
have never taken place, because of their
obvious great differences. However, many other
could be saved if only the couples in question
would be willing to work under the guidance of a
professional marriage counselor to heal their
relationships to live together in peace and
harmony.
The above discussion begs the question: “What
can love birds do to determine if they should be
married? And what can young married couples
do to stay together for life, as traditional
marriage vows demand? First, it is important to
recognize that each love bird comes from a
different nest. And regardless of resemblance,
all nests are different. Customs differ from family
to family, each having unique peculiarities and
subtleties unintelligible to outsiders, which only
emerge in a face-to-face, intimate relationship. It
is an exclusive way of life each party brings to
the relationship requiring much understanding.
He must be sensitive to hers, and she must be
as sensitive to his.
Second, the above discussion indicates that it is
crucial to define mutuality in marriage beyond
physical attraction and infatuation. Mutuality in
couple’s relations is a high degree of affinity. It
includes the physical, the intellectual, the
emotional and the creedal. Both persons in the
pre-marital or marital relationship think feel and
believe differently. And the first rule of
engagement must be to respect, understanding
and accept the other person’s perspective on
life.
What does it mean to become one in
matrimony? It means that while love birds retain
their own personalities, their joining together to
live as husband and wife gives them a higher
status of being. This new status transcends all
minor individual preferences each party
considered important in their single existence.
It becomes the responsibility of each to work
hard to honor and preserve the relationship.
Next we will tern to conflict resolution in mate
selection and marriage. Lord Bless you and
yours.
CHALLENGES AND OPPORTUNITIES
By J.C.Cordova, D.Min., LCSW
Challenge is a word often used in reference to
confrontation. It is also used on calls for
identification and validity like when an officer
stops drivers on a traffic violations and asks for
drivers' licenses. It is used to demand proof of
qualifications from people looking for work, and
so on.
By J.C.Cordova, D.Min., LCSW
Challenge is a word often used in reference to
confrontation. It is also used on calls for
identification and validity like when an officer
stops drivers on a traffic violations and asks for
drivers' licenses. It is used to demand proof of
qualifications from people looking for work, and
so on.